You should get a bear tattooed on your ass.

Vacation's over! Vacation's over! WHY. WHY. We had to leave the Traverse City Penthouse, and my best pal and I parted to our respective, distant homes (but not for much longer! Xtina will soon be moving nearby. Epic blogging will happen often!).

The memories of vacation linger, however. As do the tastes. As promised, the DESSERT from Wednesday night's lovely meal.

Butternut Squash Cranberry Walnut Bread Pudding

Say that ten times fast, bitches.

INGREEDZ:
1 loaf cranberry walnut bread (it's usually best if it's a day old or so)*
1 1/2 cups non-dairy milk (we used almond)
1 1/4 cups butternut squash (thanks Frog Holler!), cooked and mashed
1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp nutmeg
2/3 cup maple syrup
1/2 cup flour

*Our bread came from Pleasanton Bakery in TC. Yum.

Preheat oven to 350. Slice the bread into 1x1 inch cubes (I mean, you could do them smaller if you wanted. I just did it that size). Set aside. Mix together "milk", squash, spices, and syrup until well combined. Sift in flour and stir until mostly incorporated. It will be VERY liquid-y. But we're gonna amend that shit with some HEAT, son. Place this mixture into a saucepan, and heat over medium-low heat, stirring constantly. You will see your mixture gradually start to thicken over time. When it has the consistency of, perhaps, a chowder-esque soup, it's time to remove it from the heat. In a casserole dish, pour some of the pudding mixture over the bottom. Then layer on some of the bread. Then layer some pudding. Then layer some more bread. Get it? Continue this until everything is used up. I would make sure to finish with the pudding mixture on top. Get it? Got it? HOLD IT.

Let's put this sexy dish in the oven. Ours was in there approximately 35 minutes. At the 28-ish minute mark, I took the dish out and sprinkled it with large coconut flakes, so they would toast (CLASSY). Let it cool just a bit before mowing down.

NOW LET'S CLASS 'ER UP FOR A NIGHT OUT.

Realizing that this masterpiece needed ice cream, Xtina, myself, and guest Nick ran to Tom's (the grocery store) to score some vegan-friendly variety of this frozen delight. Lady Gaga guided the journey. We chose a caramel breed.

The end result (I misspelled that relust before correcting it. I don't think that was necessarily wrong, though):
Bread pudding+caramel ice cream+spiced chocolate shavings+bottle of Black Star Farms Be Dazzled wine (an excellent contribution from our guest)



Go forth.

Classy. To a Point.

This somewhat blurry photograph proves two things about the Oops! team:

1. We don't need a man to light our fireplace

and

2. We're always keeping it classy. To a point. What's classier than playing Zelda in a Traverse City penthouse? Playing it next to a roaring fire.

We're hoping you've checked out our recent comeback post about sweet potato curry burgers. Pancake expertly crafted tender, savory patties that each of us could JAZZ UP to our liking. And jazz up we did. I'm going to break down for you, dear reader, how you can boost the sophistication on your plate with some classy ingredients.

First, we started with some infused extra-virgin olive oil. Ours came from Fustini's, but it's super easy to infuse your own - just stuff some aromatic shit in a bottle of oil!

Secondly, braise your greens.

Braise –verb (used with object), braised, brais·ing. to cook (meat, fish, or vegetables) by sautéeing in fat and then simmering slowly in very little liquid

Sounds classy, doesn't it? Here at Oops! we avoid meat and fish, but we eat a LOT of kale. This champion of greens gets especially tasty when the weather turns to winter. To top our burger, we used Dinosaur kale, sauteed with ginger and braised in vegetable stock for 15 minutes or so.

Thirdly, don't just use regular onions in your dish- use carmelized onions instead. Caramelizing onions is easy! Just coat the suckers in your infused olive oil and cook over low heat, stirring often, until they look toasty brown and taste like candy.




We started the onions before anything else, and kept them going until everything was complete. What I'm trying to say is that they cooked for probably 40 minutes or so while we created our bean burger patties, braised the kale, toasted the bread, and drank a glass of wine or two.

Wine? Classy.

Another elegant ingredient we added to our burgers was roasted bell peppers - you may have noticed them peeking out beneath the delicious patty. Roasted bell peppers come either in a jar at the store or from your own oven, where they can be charred to your liking.

Are you noticing a pattern yet? To create swank, all you need to do is take normal ingredients and bump them one notch. ROASTED peppers. BRAISED kale. INFUSED oil. Fancy sea salt flakes, a garnish of cilantro, and scattered pomegranate seeds were also a part of this meal. All you need, in the end, is a little attitude.

I just want to get a bottle so I can put a fish in it.

BELIEVE IT.



We've come back.

The times changed, and the bloggers went separate ways, and Oops! was lost. We knew that it wasn't forever, and that the time would come for its gallant return. We waited until the moment was right, and that moment, my friends, is now. And Oops! will be better than ever!

We blog to you from the Traverse City penthouse (a place we have blogged from before--go back to spring). This epic return will be done in a SERIES of posts--although this trip North is short, we have much to impart. It may take us several days to get all the posts done.

Right off the bat, we have some excellent recipes to share with you, and we hope you give them a try. We had a fine dinner together with a long-lost friend here in Traverse, and it engaged many components.

Now let me say, I've eaten, and made, a lot of veggie burgers. Sometimes they turn out really crappy, sometimes they're pretty good. This recipe? BOMBER. Definitely the best I've ever made, if not one of the best I've ever HAD. Are you ready for this?

Sweet Potato Curry Burgers



1 medium sweet potato, cooked and mashed
1 cup black beans, cooked or canned
1/3-1/2 cup rolled oats
3 cloves garlic, chopped
Pepper and salt, to taste (I threw in some flakes of sea salt as well, for a pleasant surprise bite here and there)
1 1/2 teaspoons curry powder (want to learn how to make your own? Worry not! A stellar mix is on the way! The one we used for this recipe, in fact...)
Olive oil

To prepare my sweet potato, I stabbed it with a fork, wrapped it in a towel, and microwaved in 2 1/2 minute intervals until it was soft. I then peeled the skin (and ate it) before mashing the innards. Add the cup of black beans to the sweet potato, and mash in with a fork (This leaves many of the beans smashed, but some of them whole. I find this pleasant in a veggie burger). Mix in the remaining ingredients until well-incorporated. Meanwhile, heat some oil in a pan over medium heat. When it has come to temperature, form patties (whatever size you want, I suppose. We got about 4 out of it) and cook them until done! It was about 7-10 minutes per side, for our batch.



We served up this beautiful sandwich with some EXTRA. CLASSY. layers. Want to stay as classy as this sandwich? Worry not, we've got he hook-up.

Stay 'tooned for posts on Extra Classy Ingredients (the ones on this exquisite sandwich as well as others), the DELICIOUS dessert we had, wine pairings, and more. We've got lots to tell you all.

Wub Wub Wub...

For 35 to 40 hours a week, I work under the beat of Dub step. Sometimes there is relief, sometimes there is something different, but for the most part the beat lives on. Indefinitely. In my mind. Oh, God.

But, on a happier note, I have made the best vegan brownies I ever did eat. Glorious! Some have even made the bold claim that they are the best brownies they've eaten PERIOD. But again, that's a bold claim, and I don't know if we should go that far.



THE BEST VEGAN BROWNIES I EVER DID EAT

Preheat oven to 325.

1/3 cup tofu (approximately 1/6 of a block)
1/3 cup soy milk

Process the tofu in a food processor until smooth. Mix in the "milk." Pour into a medium-sized mixing bowl. Mix in

1 cup vegan granulated sugar

Meanwhile, melt together in the microwave

1/3 cup chocolate chips
3 1/2 tablespoons Earth Balance

Once melted, stir this into the tofu mix. Also into the bowl goes

1 cup whole wheat flour
1/4 cup cocoa powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt

Mix well. Finally, stir in

1/4-1/3 cup chocolate chips

Bake for 25-30 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean. Allow to cool before cutting, if you have the willpower.

I know, I know. You can thank me later.

Tofu Scramble

Its early August, and the vegetable season in Michigan is approaching its peak. Or maybe it's already hit its peak. Sort of like peak oil, except not nearly as disastrous. More like miraculous! I'm not sure something like this can be gauged. Or can it?

Bamfi.

Since we entered this glorious time of the year a couple weeks ago, my vegan cooking has been incredibly simple. Most recipes go something like this:

Ingredients: Vegetables. Olive Oil. Salt.

Procedure: Cut up vegetable, if you feel like it. Drizzle with some olive oil and sprinkle with salt.

Eat.

While these simple meals provide me, a fanatical vegetable eater, with all the satisfaction and joy I could ever want, they don't exactly make for the most exciting blog posts. What is exciting, dear readers, is living it. Summer in Michigan is short. So I urge you to take it all in.

Go outside and check out the garden. Watch your plants. Pull a few weeds. Harvest some veggies. Don't have a garden? Visit someone else's. Try here, or here, or here. I'll go with you!

Browse a farmer's market. Scope out every stand before you decide what to buy. Talk to people. Don't forget your reusable shopping bags! And when you've tired of crunching raw veggies, maybe I could suggest this Oops! take on a vegan classic - Tofu Scramble.




Ingredients:

1 tablespoon peanut oil
1 medium onion, chopped
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 green bell pepper, chopped
4 big leaves of kale, chopped
3/4 cup green beans, chopped
1 block tofu
2ish teaspoons ground cumin
1ish teaspoon ground coriander
2ish teaspoons chili powder
1/2ish teaspoon ground tumeric
a few dashes of soy sauce

Drain and crumble the tofu into a small bowl, squeezing out as much water as you can. Set aside. Heat the oil in a skillet and fry the onions until they begin to soften. Add the garlic, green bell pepper, and green beans and cook until the veggies turn bright green, stirring often. Add the spices and cook for a few seconds more, then throw in the tofu and stir until everything is combined. Add the kale and some soy sauce, and let it all hang out until the kale is wilted. Taste and adjust the seasonings. Serve with toast, tea, and some cucumbers and tomatoes from the garden, dressed in olive oil and a little salt :)

THE SHOW MUST GO ON.

Hello, friends.

It's been awhile since we've updated. Our apologies. Following the loss of Oops! beloved mascot and favorite team member, Carly, kitchen inspiration was lost. I ate a lot of crap for two weeks because I was lacking any and all creativity for cooking. Cereal happened to be dinner often. Or vegan pizza roll knock-offs.

Additionally, I was away for a bit competing in the Great Lakes Relay, a running race that goes across the Great Mitten State, starting in Rogers City and ending on the shore of Lake Michigan in Empire. Although my team suffered disastrous injuries and ultimately spent the third day playing Wiffle ball and drinking booze at the finish line instead of running, it was a good, adventurous time. Cars wouldn't start when we'd need to be at the starting line, runners were lost as a result of terrible directions, interesting people were seen engaging in such activities as walking their dogs out the windows of their trucks while towing a boat, having to drive underneath a developing tornado on the way home...Adventure! Curiosities! Danger! And long walks on the beach, holding a pole proudly displaying our team number (78).



Anyhow, I'm sure you're looking forward to the recipe that marks our valiant return. It is a lovely one!

Chocolate Chip Zucchini Bars



Preheat oven to 325.

1/6 block of tofu
1/3 cup soy milk
4 T Earth Balance

Combine in food processor until smooth. Add

3/4 cup light brown sugar
1/4 cup granulated sugar

Put into a medium-sized bowl. In a smaller bowl, mix
1 1/4 cups whole wheat flour
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
3/4 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp ground cloves

Add the bowl of dry ingredients to the wet ingredients. Mix until smooth. If it's too dry, add a little soy milk as necessary. Mix in
1 1/2 cups grated zucchini or other summer squash
1/2 cup chocolate chips

Put into greased 8-inch round pan, and spread with spatula. Cook for 30-35 minutes, or until a tooth-pick comes out clean. Delightfus!



Wait until it's cool to cut it, too.

A Tribute to my Furry Bestie

Carly Butters Pooper Hebert: May 4th 1995-July 13th 2010. She loved the kitchen.

We love you!