Friday, March 5, 2010

As my hero, Kurt Vonnegut, would say...

"All of this happened, more or less. The war parts, anyway, are pretty much true."

We told you, dear readers, that we would continue to blog about the trip. But it eroded as time went on. Our stay in Ithaca was delightful all around, but couchsurfing and surviving Amherst was a challenge. We composed this list at the Amherst Brewing Company of what happened to us in a period of about 28 hours. We saved some money by splitting an appetizer of fries for our meal. Money that was spent on hard cider instead, Original Sin brand. Here is the list. Enjoy.

ACTV lobby. Weird children's program.
Conor Sullivan.
Nice? Hugs.
Stop & Shop
Collards, not kale.
Pillow dropped on the floor. Horror!
"Is kale the staple of a vegan diet?"
Grouchy, grunting, unwelcoming housemates.
"Do you have a back-up?"
"I'm going to fight for the couches for you."
"I'm going to bed now, but I'll hook you up my friend 'Scrib' tomorrow. My housemates aren't cool with you."
Don't touch the toilet.
Deep squat.
Sky for Men soap.
"They have a COOKING blog?!?"
Stoned girl with economy-sized ketchup bottle.
No sleep.


Walk of shame.
No internets.
Fall-out shelter buildings.


Teen novels.
SCUBA>you. Alas!
"What is Puffers!?"
Candy and Transformers Lunchbook.*
Rescuing the Honda in the cover of darkness.
Maroon 5
Booze and fries.
"Get me drunk, lady. Game on."

*Supposed to be "lunchbox." Written after several drinks.

We cut our trip short by an entire day to retreat with our tails between our legs to the safety of the Upper Hand state. We listened to vast amounts of pop, consumed vegan pizza (#11) from Amici's Pizza, watched Planet Earth, and went to bed very early. Boiling more sap now, listening to The Beat of Detroit. Beyonce, deliver us.

"Beware of the man who works hard to learn something, learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before." -K.V.

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